Will My Ex Be Back:Sparks of Love Now and Forever

Introduction

This series of articles is about the spark of love. What makes a couple compatible? And is it the things we always imagined?

There are many myths about what matters and what doesn't. There are also things that you might have overlooked as the first blush of attraction crept your way.

There was something that sparked your interest and got you to your first date. Something on that date brought you back for a second.

Now you are in a relationship – you are either serious with a boyfriend or girlfriend or you are married. Now, it is time to analyze your compatibility. But this is no easy checklist. It's a combination of shared values, experiences, and interests.

But relationships are too important to not analyze. That is why we're going to look at 16 things that matter in a relationship and 7 things that don't.

What Matters?

Honesty

Love is more than a mutual sexual attraction, it is a strong emotional bond. Honesty is the glue in that bond.

To become emotionally intimate, you have to share secrets and experiences with your partner that are exclusive to you. This intense, intimate, private exchange requires honesty on the part of both parties. This means that you have to give accurate information about the present as well as the past.

You should know that being honest doesn't mean being rude. If she asks you “does this dress make me look fat?” The answer is always "NO!" You don't have to share things just to hurt your partner. Refrain from spilling your guts in a way that damages the relationship.

Remember, your partner will instinctively trust you because they have put their romantic life in your hands. But, if you violate that trust by lying, he or she may have trouble ever trusting you again.

Trust

Speaking of trust, there is no way you can know what the other person is doing 24/7. That is why you need to trust that they are not doing anything hurtful to you.

That means that you have to trust that they are not being inappropriate with another person, spending community money unwisely, or abusing alcohol, drugs, etc.

Like honesty, once trust is broken, it is hard to get back. Often, the damage done by someone who is untrustworthy can lead to a break up. If the trust violation has been serious, consider couple's counseling if you don't want a split.

Loyalty

If your partner is not for you than who is? You need your significant other to be in your corner 100 percent of the time. That doesn't mean that he or she won't ever criticize you. But it does mean that any critique will be constructive and in your best interest.

Loyalty also means being there for the other person in thick and thin. You should be able to count on your partner when the chips are down.

Finally, loyalty means that your partner is not cheating on you emotionally or sexually with another person.

Tomorrow's article will continue with this series of articles on the sparks of love.

Ps. Meanwhile you can continue watching this Free Video explaining the nuts and bolts in relationships!

Will My Ex Be Back: How To Save A Relationship

Keeping the love alive in a relationship takes work.  While the initial sparks may fly with no effort, over the long haul, it takes creativity and initiative to make things work.

Step outside of your comfort zone.  Don't do things because they're routine or expected. 

Whether you're sending her flowers for no reason or giving him a massage, you send the message that you care.  You tell the person that you're not waiting for the perfect "moment" to come along – you live (and love) in the present tense.

We met Max and Mindy at the beginning of this series of articles.  You'll remember that Mindy was feeling restless.  Max knew that in order to keep her, he needed to step it up.

He started by planning a weekend escape doing all of the things she enjoyed (including antique shopping which he could have done without).  The next week, he wrote her a love letter.

Mindy’s interest was sparked.  She, in turn, wanted to start doing things for Max.  She suggested going to a new French restaurant rather than grabbing a pizza one weekend.  For his birthday, she gave him two tickets to the WWF – and said she'd go along with him and didn't even make a funny face when she told him.

As they began to be more creative in their relationship, it spurred the other one to reciprocate.  They stopped feeling like they were in a rut.  Instead of being in a "go no where" relationship, all of a sudden, the spark was lit.  Things began to get exciting and they started to talk about the future.

If you love someone but feel like your relationship is stuck, un-stick it.  You have the power to shake things up by thinking outside of the box. 

I've given you a number of suggestions in this series of articles for how to do that.  But you should think about your particular situation and the person you love.  What would make him or her happy?  How can you do the unexpected to get a response that will move your relationship forward?

I guarantee you that if you go out on a limb, something will change in your relationship.

Ps.The Top Notch Guide to a Happy Relationship has helped more then 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back to love again!<<< =Here is how =>>>

Will My Ex Be Back:Think Mystery Date To Keep Your Love Alive

Plan a Mystery Date

Some couples do the same things for every date.  Others depend on the old "so what do you want to do?" routine.

Instead, take charge and plan a mystery date.  Take the time and care to prepare a special date.  Your partner should not be responsible for anything other than showing up.  You should pick the place, choose the activity, buy the tickets, and arrange for the dinner.

Settle on the time and dress ahead of time.  Don't whisk your love off to Paris for a romantic weekend when he or she has a major presentation at work on Monday.  You are only setting yourself up for hurt at your partner’s response if you don't take their schedule into consideration.

But, once you have agreed on the day, let yourself get creative.  Pretend you are planning the world’s most spectacular experience specifically to delight the head and heart of the person you love.

You can be lavish or low key.  It can be close by or far away. 

Keep in mind that you are planning something your partner will enjoy, not indulging in your own fantasies.  Focus on making the date, with all of its trimmings, a delight to your love.

Keep in mind that a date doesn't need to be expensive, just imaginative.  A picnic can work as well as a week in Paris.  A home cooked meal can be as romantic as a 5 star restaurant.  This is about your heart, not your wallet.

Taking responsibility to do something that you know the other person will be pleased by can be very romantic.

Will My Ex Be Back

Go Someplace New

If a tourist were to come to your town, what are the things he or she would most likely do? 

Too often we take our own environs for granted and fall into a routine for our dates.  But you don't have to repeat the same activities for every evening out.

Too many people drop into their favorite neighborhood restaurant, have a Saturday night movie date, or just hang with their friends.  You can spice up your relationship and show your partner that you care about them by doing something new.

When you put some effort into new and different activities, you demonstrate that your partner is worth putting yourself out for.

Consider checking out the weekend section of your daily newspaper or the events section of a weekly alternative paper for great ideas.

Here's a list of places you can visit together:

• Aquariums
• Zoos
• Amusement Parks
• Water Parks
• Beaches
• Museums
• Sculpture Gardens
• Botanical Gardens
• Churches
• Rowboats
• Mountains
• The Desert
• Paris
• Redwood Forest
• New York at Christmas
• Carriage Rides
• Fireplaces
• Country Lanes

Keeping your love fresh by creating a mystery date isn't difficult or expensive, unless you make it so. Just remember you are doing this for your significant other and not yourself.

Ps.Always do everything from your heart and you will make up instead of break up in your relationship!

Intimacy To Keep Your Love Alive and Well

Give Him or Her a Massage

Not every kind of being physical; involves sex.  For instance, holding hands is a sweet way to connect that doesn't imply anything more than it is.  Dancing is another way to connect physically without sex.

Similarly, giving your partner a massage can be sensual and sexy without involving sex.

The goal is to celebrate sensual intimacy independent of sexuality.  A massage doesn't have to be a seduction.  The goal is good feelings that aren't genitally centered.  You want to feel warm, happy and contented – not sexual. 

Don’t treat a massage as a quid pro quo.  It's a gift.  Maybe later your partner will want to give you a gift of massage.  But right now it is something you are giving him or her.

Will My Ex Be Back

You'll want to get some good massage oil for the massage.  Then find a flat surface in a comfortably warm room.  A bed will work, but you don't want to ruin expensive sheets and towels.  Find some soothing music and soft lighting.

You can choose to give a full body massage or a less intimate one.  If you are giving a full body massage, remember to include the hands and feet.  It’s a good idea to exclude genitalia when giving the gift of a massage and always offer the option of underwear kept on.

If you aren't at a sexual stage of a relationship, you can offer a hand and foot massage as an alternative to a full body massage.

Plan to spend at least an hour on the massage.

If you are unsure about how to give a massage, you can get a good book from the book store, take a class, or practice on a friend first (who will love being your practice object!)

Michelle and Brian decided to take a couple's massage class together.  It was a fun way to get out and meet people.  But it also strengthened their relationship because they developed a practical skill that they could use in their relationship.

Now they love to give – and receive – massages and they feel that they are competent in giving them.  They feel like they save hundreds of dollars a year in masseuse fees and give each other a special gift at the same time.

Shampoo and Bathe Your Love

In many cultures, baths have had ritual status both as a way of purifying but also of relaxing and celebrating.

There is something very loving about washing someone.  The warm water, soap and bubbles take us back to being cared for and pampered and loved. 

A long, careful, gentle shampoo is sexy.  Get some scented candles and soft music to go along with it.

While a shower has its own sex appeal, that’s not what were talking about here. 

Bathing together when there is a hygiene problem on the part of one partner can be a fun and nifty way of bypassing those less than romantic odor discussions.

You can also make bathing independent of lovemaking.  In fact, it may be even more romantic when it is independent of sex.  Play geisha girl or boy to your loved one.

Ps. Take Care of yourself and your relationship and it may last forever. Need some emergency advice about
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