Will My Ex Be Back:3rd Article in the Series On Sparks of Love

Sparks of love must continue in a relationship and one way to do that is to be sharing the same goals as your partner.

Shared Goals

There may be instant attraction across a crowded room, but a relationship can not exist on initial sizzle alone. Along the way, you have to develop some shared goals.

Both partners need to feel good about where they – and their relationship – is going.

For instance, if one person wants a long term commitment that leads to marriage and the other is looking for a casual arrangement, the relationship is not likely to last.

Similarly, if one partner wants children and the other is allergic to kids, there may be a serious fracture in the marriage.

In order for a relationship to work, there are many compromises that have to be made. But, there are some things for which there are no compromises available. For these kinds of goals, you must be in tandem if you want your relationship to go forward.

Timing

It may be that the person you marry is the person you are dating at the time in your life that you are ready to get married. Timing plays an important role in a successful relationship.

You may meet a really great guy or gal when you are 19 and things go along just great. But, at 19, you are focused on school and starting a career and aren't ready to settle down. By the time you are ready, you've moved to different cities and the bond has been broken.

Similarly, you may meet someone right after you have gone through a divorce. But, you are not in an emotional place to let someone new into your life. So, that will be a fish that got away.

Timing is an important component in the kind of men or women you develop strong relationships with.

Communication

You don't have to agree on everything to make your relationship work. But, you do have to have a way to discuss things and resolve differences. If you can handle this in a reasonable way, you can be happy despite your differences.

Consider developing strong relationship communication skills. For instance, employ the tactic of reflective listening. This means that you repeat back what the other person has said and ask if your interpretation is correct. You can also employ empathetic communication where you acknowledge the other person's point of view and then state your own.

Keep tabs on your tone of voice, the volume, and the speed at which you talk. Think about what messages your face is conveying (ie. Rolled eyes, frowning). Consider moderating your gestures and making them more inclusive. Think about what your body positioning is – are you leaning forward and engaging in the conversation or leaning back and disengaging?

Your communication with your partner doesn't mean total agreement, but it means finding a way to live with each other's opinions.

Fun

Life is not meant to be spent balancing the checkbook and disciplining the kids. Life is to be enjoyed. You should have fun with your partner.

If love is going to be developed, you must genuinely enjoy spending time with the other person.

Try to keep fun in the relationship even in the most stressful times. When you have the money to be extravagant from time to time, indulge the relationship. And, even when money is tight, you can find ways to have fun on the cheap or even free. Window shopping, after all, doesn't cost a dime.
Ps. ==>>Great ways to make your relationship top notch <<==

Will My Ex Be Back:Think Mystery Date To Keep Your Love Alive

Plan a Mystery Date

Some couples do the same things for every date.  Others depend on the old "so what do you want to do?" routine.

Instead, take charge and plan a mystery date.  Take the time and care to prepare a special date.  Your partner should not be responsible for anything other than showing up.  You should pick the place, choose the activity, buy the tickets, and arrange for the dinner.

Settle on the time and dress ahead of time.  Don't whisk your love off to Paris for a romantic weekend when he or she has a major presentation at work on Monday.  You are only setting yourself up for hurt at your partner’s response if you don't take their schedule into consideration.

But, once you have agreed on the day, let yourself get creative.  Pretend you are planning the world’s most spectacular experience specifically to delight the head and heart of the person you love.

You can be lavish or low key.  It can be close by or far away. 

Keep in mind that you are planning something your partner will enjoy, not indulging in your own fantasies.  Focus on making the date, with all of its trimmings, a delight to your love.

Keep in mind that a date doesn't need to be expensive, just imaginative.  A picnic can work as well as a week in Paris.  A home cooked meal can be as romantic as a 5 star restaurant.  This is about your heart, not your wallet.

Taking responsibility to do something that you know the other person will be pleased by can be very romantic.

Will My Ex Be Back

Go Someplace New

If a tourist were to come to your town, what are the things he or she would most likely do? 

Too often we take our own environs for granted and fall into a routine for our dates.  But you don't have to repeat the same activities for every evening out.

Too many people drop into their favorite neighborhood restaurant, have a Saturday night movie date, or just hang with their friends.  You can spice up your relationship and show your partner that you care about them by doing something new.

When you put some effort into new and different activities, you demonstrate that your partner is worth putting yourself out for.

Consider checking out the weekend section of your daily newspaper or the events section of a weekly alternative paper for great ideas.

Here's a list of places you can visit together:

• Aquariums
• Zoos
• Amusement Parks
• Water Parks
• Beaches
• Museums
• Sculpture Gardens
• Botanical Gardens
• Churches
• Rowboats
• Mountains
• The Desert
• Paris
• Redwood Forest
• New York at Christmas
• Carriage Rides
• Fireplaces
• Country Lanes

Keeping your love fresh by creating a mystery date isn't difficult or expensive, unless you make it so. Just remember you are doing this for your significant other and not yourself.

Ps.Always do everything from your heart and you will make up instead of break up in your relationship!

Will My Ex Be Back: How To Surprise Your Partner

Clean Your Love's Place

Leslie was very organized by nature.  Rick was not.  Rick's work shed was an absolute mess and he complained that he could never find anything. 

The work shed was someplace that Leslie didn't frequent.  She didn't care whether he kept it clean or not.  But, she knew that he would love to have it organized.

So, as a birthday gift, she gave him a note saying she would clean it for him.

Many times men express their love for their partner by "doing things."  Women should do the same.

Doing something concrete for the person you love can be one of the most romantic things you can do.  When she comes in and cleans his place or he goes and cleans out her rain gutters, partners are making a time commitment into the relationship.

The idea of someone we love doing something we loathe is just really cool.  Besides, cleaning someone else's place isn't as bad as working on your own place.

Don't send the message that "you’re a slob" though.  You might want to clean one room, for instance.  Do it in a spirit of love and not "I'm sick of this clutter."

Don"t think about throwing anything away – especially things that he or she loves.  Remember, it’s not about changing his or her behavior but about showing how much you care.  It"s okay to polish the chrome in the bathroom, but throwing things out is not okay.

It's not fair to peak into drawers and invade someone's private life when you are doing them a favor and cleaning.

Also, unless you have a key and free reign of the place, giving a "gift certificate" good for doing the laundry, cleaning the oven, mowing the lawn or waxing the car may be a better idea than breaking and entering.

Do Something He or She Likes

No two people are exactly alike.  In the early days of a relationship, you"re probably willing to do just about anything to spend time with your partner.  But, as the relationship develops, you start to want to spend time doing "your" things or doing things together that you can both enjoy.

That's why it is such a treat when you say you'll do something that your partner likes exclusively.  Give her tickets to the ballet (and the promise that you'll go without complaining.  Give him tickets to Professional Wrestling and avoid making comments that it's all made up.

And, you don't have to actually give the tickets.  Give a "gift certificate" for "one event of your chose with no complaints and no strings attached."

Your willingness to do something you hate because the person you love loves it, is one of the true signs of love.

Another idea is to give a gift certificate for a "night out with the girls or boys" without recrimination or recompense (and of course, without whining).  This tells your partner that you care about them and really want to make them happy.  Even though you do lots of things together, you don't have to do everything together.
Ps. This is the perfect gift to yourself to maintain a loving relationship ==>>>